Sam's Club Trip

Got a rhyme? Got a gag? Want a laugh? Check this out...

Sam's Club Trip

Postby KCCO_773 - March 14th, 2010, 11:26 am

As posted on the Buick Forum that I'm on... enjoy..

Yesterday I was at my local Sam's Club buying a large bag of Purina dog
chow for my loyal pet, Biscuit, the Wonder Dog and was in the checkout line
when a woman behind me asked if I had a dog.

What did she think I had, an elephant? So since I'm retired and have
little to do, on impulse I told her that no, I didn't have a dog, I was
starting the Purina Diet again. I added that I probably shouldn't,
because I ended up in the hospital last time, but that I'd lost 50
pounds before I awakened in an intensive care ward with tubes coming out of
most of my orifices and IVs in both arms.

I told her that it was essentially a perfect diet and that the way that
it works is to load your pants pockets with Purina nuggets and simply
eat one or two every time you feel hungry. The food is nutritionally
complete so it works well and I was going to try it again.. (I have to
mention here that practically everyone in line was now enthralled with
my story.) Horrified, she asked if I ended up in intensive care because
the dog food poisoned me. I told her no, I stepped off a curb to sniff
an Irish Setter's butt and a car hit us both.

I thought the guy behind her was going to have a heart attack he was
laughing so hard.

Sam's won't let me shop there anymore.

Better watch what you ask retired people. They have all the time in the
world to think of crazy things to say. Forward this (especially) to all
your retired friends......it will be their Laugh for the day
"Walking isn't a lost art: one must, by some means, get to the garage." -Evan Evasar

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Re: Sam's Club Trip

Postby Colleen - March 14th, 2010, 12:21 pm

:lol: :clap: :clap:

Good one! :thumb:
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Re: Sam's Club Trip

Postby US MARINER 1 - March 14th, 2010, 12:45 pm

Good One! :hyst: :clap: :lol:
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Re: Sam's Club Trip

Postby jpark - March 14th, 2010, 1:51 pm

:lol: :hyst: :clap:

I'm enough of a troublemaker already. I didn't need to hear that one!
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Re: Sam's Club Trip

Postby RobtRoma - March 14th, 2010, 3:28 pm

Excellent!!! :lol: :hyst:
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The real art of conversation is not only to say the right thing at the right time, but also to leave unsaid the wrong thing at the tempting moment...
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Re: Sam's Club Trip

Postby stone - March 14th, 2010, 4:16 pm

:thumb: :lol:
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Re: Sam's Club Trip

Postby Airmapper - March 14th, 2010, 9:01 pm

:lol: :hyst: :lol:
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Re: Sam's Club Trip

Postby futameca - March 15th, 2010, 11:21 am

:thumb: :lol:
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Re: Sam's Club Trip

Postby jonas1022 - March 15th, 2010, 4:37 pm

:lol: :lol: :lol:

My hero!

:peace:
aka "David"
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