[jpark]

A budget is just a method of worrying before you spend money, as well as afterward.

 

[jpark]

Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder.

 

[jpark]

Error, no keyboard. Press F1 to continue.

:bill:

 

[jpark]

Laughing stock: cattle with a sense of humor.

 

[jpark]

(I love Office Space!)

For every action there is an equal and opposite criticism.

 

[jpark]

Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish, and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day.

 

[jpark]

He who laughs last thinks slowest.

 

[jpark]

:hyst:

A closed mouth gathers no foot.

 

[jpark]

A bartender is just a pharmacist with a limited inventory.

 

[jpark]

Energizer Bunny arrested and charged with battery.

 

[jpark]

"The Artist Formerly Known as NoBoundInJax?"

:clap:

 

[jpark]

Never ask a barber if he thinks you need a haircut.

 

[jpark]

:shock2:

 

[jpark]

Not if his pants didn't survive.

 

[jpark]

:topic:

[ducking]

How does Teflon stick to the pan?

 

[jpark]

:clap:

I get enough exercise just pushing my luck.

 

[jpark]

...and super glue.

 

[jpark]

Gargling is a good way to see if your throat leaks.

:bill:

 

[jpark]

What happens if you get scared half-to-death, twice?

 

[jpark]

Multitasking means screwing up several things at once.